A Change of Direction

I was rethinking my answer.  I wanted a second chance to defend myself, my faith.  Did I slough off because it was easier?  Was it "too complicated" to get into just that moment? 

The stronger you think you are, the weaker you become.

In my continuing effort to rely not on another's opinion, but to study to show myself approved, I find myself researching man's interpretation still.  Why?  A book written in a language not my own brings me to "their" table, "their"  level of integrity, ability...faith.  Prayers of understanding, discernment and guidance go unheeded...it seems. 

Searching for truth.  Time spent fruitfully.

In the midst of online research, a posting in Facebook draws my attention.  "The true test of faith is to forgive someone who is not sorry!"  It pulls me away from diligent search and brings me to my knees with repenting heart.  Connected?  Surely.  The one thing I spend time on may be overshadowed by the true need of my soul.  Being "right" isn't always preeminent - forgiveness is.

Forgiveness doesn't always benefit the one to whom it it given; rather it is the ultimate in peace and tranquility from knowing the forgiveness you give is a shadow only of the grace from God. 

Frustrating the Flustered

There was a snake in our pool yesterday.  I found it.  Alive.  Its presence was short lived because Terry came to the rescue and removed it with the leaf skimmer, then fed it to the birds.  It was a very young snake.  I wonder where its mother is...or siblings?

This small snake was not evil in itself, but it presented a danger to my family and an affront to my senses because it had envaded my space. 

As Terry slowly moved the skimmer toward the little fellow, he became frustrated and agitated, thrashing and squirming when he became cornered.  Wanting in the water initially, he now wanted out but not by the help of this giant with a skimmer. You see, he went where he had no business going.  Not being able to overcome his predicament, he needed help but he didn't want to pay the price. 

Each decision made calls for an action and result. Frustration often comes with the result.

Frustration for me can lead to hateful, retaliating words and then tears of dispair.  Being armed with experience and careful consideration does not guarantee acceptance and cooperation. Having been here before, at some point the reality of limitation and subsequent surrender is inevitable. What I consider being responsible and providing guidance may mean control to others. 

When lie is heavy and hard to take, go off by yourself.  Enter the silence.  Bow in prayer.  Don't ask questions: wait for hope to appear.  Don't run from trouble.  Take it full-face.  The "worst" is never the worst. (Lamentations 3:28-30 The Message)

With my kind husband providing the verse, I know that my efforts may seem to have been in vain, but there is a God in heaven who hears my cries and knows my every despair, indeed, my every failure.  But there is always reason to hope.  What a blessing in God's Word.

  

Stillness

There is a stillness in early mornings that speak to the soul.  Mists lifting from the grasses on rolling fields and yard where deer graze peacefully and quietly.  When birds still nestle with heads tucked, not ready to lift their songs to the world.  When the sun has not succeeded in piercing its rays of light for a sunny welcome to the day, yet the glow is spreading rapidly in the East.  When the only sounds in this house are the clock ticking in the kitchen, and the soft meow of the cats wanting their first morsels of the day.

How blessed to have this view, this moment, this hour of quietness to speak to my Lord, to marvel at His scriptures, to pray in thankfulness for my blessings and to ask Him to bless others.  My heart is full, over-flowing.  I am blessed.

Make Me a Servant

It never ceases to amaze me...He always knows what I need when I need it.  He prods my heart and kindles a desire in me that must be fulfilled.

Devotionals arrive in my emails, harmoniously echoing a thought heavy on my mind.  A sermon is given, prompting deeper meaning, and the desire fairly bursts from me!

A song new to me is sung in worship, further solidifying the need...

Make me a servant
Humble and meek
Lord let me lift up those who are weak
And may the prayers of my heart always be
Make me a servant
Make me a servant
Make me a servant today

And may the prayers of my heart always be
Make me a servant
Make me a servant
Make me a servant today

As the Lord knows I want to serve him more, I must be alert to the opportunities He puts before me.  I must be better prepared...

But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, - (1 Peter 3:15)

A missionary from the 1800's or so made this quote:  "Some want to live within the sound of church or chapel bell; I want to run a rescue shop within a yard of hell." ~C.T. Studd

Wanting to live your life fully, according to the will of God, recognizing a need and stepping up to the plate...what am I doing today to fulfill and honor what I know the Lord wants of my life?  What are you?