Showing posts with label grace. Show all posts
Showing posts with label grace. Show all posts

Monday, November 3, 2014

My Tapestry

A soap opera junkie...me?  Off and on during my years, I have become enamored, sadly, to one soap or another.  My one and only left is Days of Our Lives.  I quickly became enmeshed in their lives, recording the episode to watch at night.  Impatient at times with the exaggerated slowness of events unfolding, the time came when I could ignore no longer the emptiness of their lives, the shallowness of their characters and the immoral fiber strung through each viewing.  As my husband so aptly put one night (sometimes he had to endure the episode while trying to sleep), "people are never happy on that show and they never work!"

At times, the producer of this show would recap - showing old footage and using clips that reminded you of who this or that person used to be, who they were married to, and what terrible storms they had weathered.  The characters usually remain true throughout, and past deeds convince you of his/her probable course in life.  Their lives are lived before you showing every color, every vibrant hue...and every dark thread.

It is the dark color, this deepening of void that attracts...recognizing the lure of forbidden while anticipating the reaction when faced with dire consequences.  It is this darkness that can compel, spellbind, delude, and slowly but eventually acclimate you to immorality.  

This darkness is not exclusive to soap operas.  From family members who relentlessly pursue the dangerous course of their lives, to fellow workers indulging in the drugs of life to fill empty hours and shallow desires.  From T.V. shows to reality, the present culture weaves its treacherous whims as destiny...a pattern we can mimic or reject, pursue or turn from.  

But then the episode ends, the deceit revealed, and the end in sight...unless the writer of their lives invents a new thread.

There are threads woven in my life that I had rather pull out, discard...pretend it didn't exist.  But pretending is only that, and I am faced with the life of me, dotted with ill-chosen threads, this tapestry of life that is bound to my being, ultimately shaped to His good! 


The thread woven in me is encased in a mercy quite beyond my comprehension. Despite my unworthiness, there is a Master Weaver who blots out my transgressions and turns my life of threads into a soul devoted to Him, thankful for His grace and His faithfulness.  Thank you, Jehovah God, for your mercy and grace, for the sacrifice of Your Son.  May your glory shine through each of us, reflecting your love!


The Tapestry

A missionary was traveling in the Far East
 when he came across a booth in a market place
It was a tapestry maker’s booth.
As he walked by he saw a strange sight. 

There appeared in the tapestry almost by magic , 
and the missionary asked his guide for an explanation. 

“The man you see,” said the guide, “Is a master weaver. 
He is speaking to his apprentice 
behind the loom telling him what color thread to use and where to put it.
 Only the weaver knows the entire design, so it is vital that the apprentice do 
exactly as the master commands.” 

“Does the apprentice ever make a mistake?’ asked the missionary. 

“Of course. But the weaver is a very kind man in this case and
 he will rarely have the boy take out the thread.
 Instead, being a great artist, he simply works the mistake in the design.”

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Who, Me???

Caught off guard, the chastising was a shock to my system.  The shock lasting through my exit, the ride home brought forth feelings of being vilified, unfairly heard, and then unfortunately, resentment.  Sleepless that night, the myriad of emotions flowing through the following day ran the gamut. 

You see, I wanted the true object of their dissatisfaction to step up and take the blame, to rescue me from this perceived blemish on myself, to return to my deserved elevation! 

Enter the deceiver:  telling me to withdraw...after proclaiming my self-righteous denial to these leaders by a copiously written email perhaps...but to remove myself from duties that I have loved so much.  Spiteful, revengeful thoughts which I knew to be at the very time they appeared but unable to stop the flow.

Retreating to my Kindle and hoping to immerse myself in reading instead, I opened to this page:
"The sobering reality is that proud, unbroken Christians have done far more damage to the church of Jesus Christ than any sinners outside the church could inflict."
Pride?  Again?  Did I let myself fall to pride's prey again?  In my want to protect my own image (hardly a humble position,  right?), did I miss the very heart of the gospel and God's grace?  Was it coincidence that I was already reading a book on Brokenness, Surrender, Holiness?  I think not.  Thanking the Lord for remembering me, for knowing my needs before I did, the tears fell and His Spirit flooded my entire body.  

When you think you have learned it all, you are reminded of how little you know.  When you think you have mastered a fault, new situations may give rise to an old sin.  When you think you are invincible, invaluable and mighty, you are reminded of how much you need and depend on the Savior.  That is brokenness!
"As wax or clay must be soft and pliable in order to be molded by the artist's hands, so the broken, contrite heart is easily molded by the hand of God and does not harden itself against the circumstances God chooses to mold it."
And,
"Broken men and women have nothing to protect and nothing to lose." 
You see, a broken and contrite heart has no room for pride, bitterness, rebellion and  self-righteous indignation!  Proverbs, James and 1 Peter tell us that God resists the proud but pours grace on the humble.  
"Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will exalt you." (James 4:10)
I thank the Lord for His faithfulness in exposing my weaknesses, for His mercy and forgiveness when I fail, and for His promises to lift me up when I fall.  I thank Him for the leadership in the church, and I pray blessings on each one and his family.  I thank Him for reminding me when I am not being a blessing to my church family and when my self-worth comes before His truths.  I thank Him for His Spirit that has become a mirror for my soul, showing always the right path to take, the right spirit to maintain. 

Are you a proud or broken person?  Sometimes, it's hard to recognize.  I'd love to talk with you about it. Drop me a comment or email me directly at ann.annieevans@gmail.com.  And thanks for dropping by! 




Friday, April 27, 2012

Pesky Doubt

Praying in the morning, looking out over the green grass and fields dotted with flowers outside my windows...one of the best times of my day.  Thanking the Lord for His creation and wondering how magnificent heaven must be, longing to see it...longing to see Him...the vision brings me face to face with recounting my life...and I falter and tremble.  Words of praise begin to stutter and invading memories close up the throat and force tears. 

Doubt is a self-defeating, ingenious tool and evil uses it skillfully. 
How does one live with being forgiven?  How does one accept this ridiculously undeserving act of...well, grace?  How does one look into the face of the graceful one and not want to literally cut away the selfish, horrid, unfathomable acts of the past when you love the graceful one with every fiber of your being and can stand no more the mere thought of displeasing Him?  How does one rewrite life?

You cannot.  It's done. 
Prayer is interrupted by tears of sorrow, doubts of inferior makeup too tainted to be loved or fully forgiven.  How many times has doubt marred my moments and old fears consumed my body? 

Relinquishing my efforts in prayer and picking up the laptop instead, the first devotional email speaks of turning your mess into a message:

"God happens to be in the restoration business.  He is willing to restore and heal all who come to Him.  It doesn't matter who are you, what you've done, or what has been done to you.  God is willing and able to turn any tragedy into triumph..."
~Micca Campbell 

As I read, I am overcome with yet another message: 

The Healer of the broken
The friend to every sinner
Who knows the sorrow of each scar...
~Gwen & Sue Smith

You see, it is the scars that concern me.  How can I proclaim the goodness of Christ if my scars detract from the message?  The hardest part of living life is forgiving myself for what the Lord has already forgiven!

Another devotional message comes in:

"Recently I was thanking the Father for his mercy.  And I began listing the sins he’d forgiven.  “Remember the time I…” But I stopped.  Something was wrong.  It didn’t fit.  Does he remember?

Then I remembered.  I remembered his words in Hebrews 8:12: “And I will remember their sins no more.”  Wow!

God doesn’t just forgive, he forgets.  He erases the board.  He destroys the evidence. He burns the microfilm.  He clears the computer.  He doesn’t remember!"
~Max Lucado

Overcome with emotion, my tears are fresh with joy again!  It is always most humbling when I realize He hears my prayers!  BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY, you are never alone and His word is truth!  He will give you what you need, when you need it, and His timing is always exactly on time!  Because He loves and forgives, therefore, I will love and forgive, too.

My prayer for you and me this day and every day:

     “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul
 and with all your strength and with all your mind; and,
Love your neighbor as yourself."   Luke 20:27

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Who New




Early spring.  Grass shoots up greener, trees begin to expand with buds, yellow daffodils emerge til heads are full blown, and new calves kick their heels and run with abandonment in the fields next door.  Birds sing louder and the urge to bask in sunshine is strong.  My part of earth is waking with newness and joy.  The blissfulness of living with seasons, ever changing, giving new sights and sounds as each day is a new day.  Thank you, Lord, for a new day!

New is invigorating.  New is intoxicating.  New is joyful and full of promise.  New is what we want to share with others, relishing their delight in our good fortune.  

New is what the Lord gives me every hour...a newness in soulful anticipation of purpose and belonging...new is God's grace!  For the grace of God is righteous and He gives freely...even to me, the worst of sinners.  Each moment spent reflecting on repentance and forgiveness points time and again to His grace.   God's grace is love.


Time cannot be regained; opportunities missed cannot be duplicated.  But each moment forward is new and hope is reborn...grace reigns.   


But if it is by grace, it is no longer on the basis of works; otherwise grace would no longer be grace.  (Romans 11:6)